What I find interesting about a majority of these answers, is the general belief that men are the ones most commonly at fault for being "too nice." I for one, consider myself to be a very nice guy, who also is hardly a pushover. I think a big misconception of the "nice guy" argument, is the general ideology that men who are "boring" should learn to become more of a challenge or less predictable. I for one have been in many stable relationships where being "boring" was not considered a problem. If a man, or woman, doesn't have the same characteristics they are looking for in a partner, is it fair to put the blame on the opposite sex? If you are looking for excitement and unpredictability, more than likely, your partner will be looking for the same traits in you. Nobody can sustain a serious relationship, that is always exciting or unpredictable. This can happen on occasion, but a majority of life is not exciting and unpredictable, which is why that notion is controversial in itself. I'm not trying to be sexist, but in all fairness, relationships are built on trust and common interests. If you are male or female and are emotionally secure with who you are, you would not need a person to challenge you or bring all the excitement into your life. The notion that it is a man's job to be exciting, unpredictable, and fantastic in bed, at best is very shallow and egocentric. I for one am not attracted to women who expect me to do all the leading in a relationship, or challenge them. I do agree that most healthy women do like a man who is decisive, emotionally attentive, and good humored. However, most people, who are stable and emotionally mature will not want a needy person, who is looking for someone else to change an aspect or shortcoming in their life. If what you are looking for is someone to "Make your life exciting," you may need a shrink, more than you do a boyfriend. Relationships are about sharing responsibilities. No healthy person, male or female, would stay with a person who is doing all the leading or work to maintain it. Deric sebastian in uganga
When I'm with a guy who is very easy to please, I don't feel a need to take the relationship any further. I don't have an interest in getting dressed up because hes happy regardless, or even do little things for him.. Women want somebody they can look up to, someone they have to go out of their way to please. Its intriguing, its fun, it pushes us to be better. Challenge our ideas every once in awhile, you don't have to be mean, but if your so easy to get along with then a woman might feel that you're desperate, and that she can be easily replaced by any girl. If a woman can land a guy with high standards, its like winning the lottery. You're proud to be with the person you're with, you know you fought for them. And you know they must truly look up to you if "love" wasn't a word that was in their vocabulary before they met you, and now it is. Jimi kabwe
I have been a nice guy always trying to be courteous to others and treat them kindly. I acted like that because i was shy, lacked confidence with girls that is with anything else i would just haphzardly jump into any crazy situation. In my relationship with girls i think i did come of as being to needy, I was so accepting to anything they did and was preaty laid back. I should of said something if i had a problem with the situation. You don't want to seem desperate. I have learned however you cant always be nice, the guy has to make the girl work to. In other words before you can be yourself you must first find the things that are seriously wrong with you and confront them head on. If your a nice guy dont be afraid to do something new, for example do something completely unexpected and crazy, people will be startled and amazed that they haven't noticed you before. Answer
This new generation love bad boys, because they are bad girls too. I never love bad boy ever. What can u talk about bad boy! they are good on bed! that is bu-shit! What u need is a good boys who can respect all the time! Who can listen your concern and be there for you. You can't tell bad boy tha you love him! He will tell you to stop playing, because he knows himself that he can't be lovable, he is a bad boy! So, is kind like you are westing your time loving a bad boy.
Here some Phrases for a good boys want to here all the time. 1. I like you. 2.You are the best. 3.“I trust you, I know you can do it." 4. I am so lucky I met you. 5.What would I do without you. 6.You drive me crazy. 7.You are so hot. 8.I love you. But, You can't tell bad boys all of this! The will still bad boys, never change. I love good boys or men.
because they are after bad boys like us who bring challenges,excitements and new interesting things everyday making them not prefer the nice dudes at all!!@dee..
Who is the nice guy in this case!!!! We need to know the bottomline of this measure for us to draw our opnion! Because nice is relative here or subjective! However basing on the previous writers if I got them right in their perspective they discussed this boy!!!! Then opps I for one would rather a nice boy than a .....! Ammmm who on planet would not like a nice thing!!! Well with the trend of boys and girl pacing each other to reach certain hieghts I would really like the nice guy because chances of improving them for the acceptable expectations are higher than those of the bad boys!!! Well its better for every shape to fit in its type of hole!! Nice girls should be for nice boys and bad boys should be for bad girls for easy acceptability thats if they do not collide over pride that is the biggest problem for both nice boys and girls
well I aint a gurl...but i think gurlz dont like nice guyz because the sorta love they offer is in the playbook...the do erthang as how its spoused to be...they aint adventurous watso eva..gurlz like an adventure where by they dont know wats gon happen next...the suspence sorta keeps the whole relationship alive....inno.k....
I had to jump in on this one. Sad but true that many don't find value in guys committed to consistency, strategic focus and honesty. Seeking adventure in relationship can be dangerous and I certainly would not want a man who needs to behave in ways to keep me entertained. The true nice guys want nice women who are able to be a stable support through good times and bad. Give me a man who might seem boring to some but to me, you can always infuse fun into a consistent relationship on which you can depend.
What I find interesting about a majority of these answers, is the general belief that men are the ones most commonly at fault for being "too nice." I for one, consider myself to be a very nice guy, who also is hardly a pushover. I think a big misconception of the "nice guy" argument, is the general ideology that men who are "boring" should learn to become more of a challenge or less predictable. I for one have been in many stable relationships where being "boring" was not considered a problem.
ReplyDeleteIf a man, or woman, doesn't have the same characteristics they are looking for in a partner, is it fair to put the blame on the opposite sex? If you are looking for excitement and unpredictability, more than likely, your partner will be looking for the same traits in you. Nobody can sustain a serious relationship, that is always exciting or unpredictable. This can happen on occasion, but a majority of life is not exciting and unpredictable, which is why that notion is controversial in itself.
I'm not trying to be sexist, but in all fairness, relationships are built on trust and common interests. If you are male or female and are emotionally secure with who you are, you would not need a person to challenge you or bring all the excitement into your life. The notion that it is a man's job to be exciting, unpredictable, and fantastic in bed, at best is very shallow and egocentric.
I for one am not attracted to women who expect me to do all the leading in a relationship, or challenge them. I do agree that most healthy women do like a man who is decisive, emotionally attentive, and good humored. However, most people, who are stable and emotionally mature will not want a needy person, who is looking for someone else to change an aspect or shortcoming in their life. If what you are looking for is someone to "Make your life exciting," you may need a shrink, more than you do a boyfriend. Relationships are about sharing responsibilities. No healthy person, male or female, would stay with a person who is doing all the leading or work to maintain it. Deric sebastian in uganga
When I'm with a guy who is very easy to please, I don't feel a need to take the relationship any further. I don't have an interest in getting dressed up because hes happy regardless, or even do little things for him.. Women want somebody they can look up to, someone they have to go out of their way to please. Its intriguing, its fun, it pushes us to be better. Challenge our ideas every once in awhile, you don't have to be mean, but if your so easy to get along with then a woman might feel that you're desperate, and that she can be easily replaced by any girl. If a woman can land a guy with high standards, its like winning the lottery. You're proud to be with the person you're with, you know you fought for them. And you know they must truly look up to you if "love" wasn't a word that was in their vocabulary before they met you, and now it is.
ReplyDeleteJimi kabwe
I have been a nice guy always trying to be courteous to others and treat them kindly. I acted like that because i was shy, lacked confidence with girls that is with anything else i would just haphzardly jump into any crazy situation. In my relationship with girls i think i did come of as being to needy, I was so accepting to anything they did and was preaty laid back. I should of said something if i had a problem with the situation. You don't want to seem desperate. I have learned however you cant always be nice, the guy has to make the girl work to. In other words before you can be yourself you must first find the things that are seriously wrong with you and confront them head on. If your a nice guy dont be afraid to do something new, for example do something completely unexpected and crazy, people will be startled and amazed that they haven't noticed you before.
ReplyDeleteAnswer
This new generation love bad boys, because they are bad girls too. I never love bad boy ever. What can u talk about bad boy! they are good on bed! that is bu-shit! What u need is a good boys who can respect all the time! Who can listen your concern and be there for you. You can't tell bad boy tha you love him! He will tell you to stop playing, because he knows himself that he can't be lovable, he is a bad boy! So, is kind like you are westing your time loving a bad boy.
ReplyDeleteHere some Phrases for a good boys want to here all the time.
1. I like you.
2.You are the best.
3.“I trust you, I know you can do it."
4. I am so lucky I met you.
5.What would I do without you.
6.You drive me crazy.
7.You are so hot.
8.I love you.
But, You can't tell bad boys all of this! The will still bad boys, never change. I love good boys or men.
because they are after bad boys like us who bring challenges,excitements and new interesting things everyday making them not prefer the nice dudes at all!!@dee..
ReplyDeleteWho is the nice guy in this case!!!! We need to know the bottomline of this measure for us to draw our opnion! Because nice is relative here or subjective! However basing on the previous writers if I got them right in their perspective they discussed this boy!!!! Then opps I for one would rather a nice boy than a .....! Ammmm who on planet would not like a nice thing!!! Well with the trend of boys and girl pacing each other to reach certain hieghts I would really like the nice guy because chances of improving them for the acceptable expectations are higher than those of the bad boys!!! Well its better for every shape to fit in its type of hole!! Nice girls should be for nice boys and bad boys should be for bad girls for easy acceptability thats if they do not collide over pride that is the biggest problem for both nice boys and girls
ReplyDeletewell I aint a gurl...but i think gurlz dont like nice guyz because the sorta love they offer is in the playbook...the do erthang as how its spoused to be...they aint adventurous watso eva..gurlz like an adventure where by they dont know wats gon happen next...the suspence sorta keeps the whole relationship alive....inno.k....
ReplyDeleteI had to jump in on this one. Sad but true that many don't find value in guys committed to consistency, strategic focus and honesty. Seeking adventure in relationship can be dangerous and I certainly would not want a man who needs to behave in ways to keep me entertained. The true nice guys want nice women who are able to be a stable support through good times and bad. Give me a man who might seem boring to some but to me, you can always infuse fun into a consistent relationship on which you can depend.
ReplyDeleteTW